Glenn Hates Books Vol. 1 by Glenn Conly

First of all, Glenn Conly doesn’t hate books, just poorly written ones. Glen Conly’s book of reviews ranges and rages from one-star vitriolic personal attacks on authors to five-star honest, accurate and insightful observations. If suggesting an author deserves anal or oral rape doesn’t offend you, then this is your five-star compilation of reviews.

If you can get past more blatant pornographic exposition and language than the average Marine drill-instructor uses, then this is your book.  I believe this author’s excesses may cause him to miss an opportunity for his work to become a best-selling series. Granted 90% of the self-published works out there offer a fertile bed of manure in which Conly revels with hilarity, but he caters only to sci-fi, dystopian, porn, fantasy, and post-apocalyptic works. I couldn’t help but think what wonderfully hilarious observations he might have of some so-called “literary” works where authors look like Russian gymnasts with wardrobe malfunctions.

Pat Conroy’s “South of Broad” and  John Green’s “Looking for Alaska” are prime examples where the writing is phenomenal until one realizes there’s this big elephant standing in the room because many of the characters are high school kids talking with the insight and depth of Bohemians on the left bank. Or Ben Fountain’s “Billy Lynn’s Long Halftime Walk,”  where the author opens every jar on the literary spice rack, dumping the entire lot in the mix. Reading it was like watching the aforementioned Russian gymnast perform in a pink tutu with a huge flower in her hair and glow-in-the-dark shoes.

Glenn Conly could have the high-brow snoots of academia leaping in horror from their ivy walls. I believe Conly has a tremendous opportunity to produce a series of mixed genre reviews with broad appeal if he can minus much of the pornographic description, language, and personal attacks. I believe like many comedians, such as Red Foxx and Richard Pryor who began their careers with sewer-pipe humor, Glenn Conly has an opportunity to reach a new level of sophistication with his humor, thus garnering wider appeal. It is a shame that so many idiots can so easily publish so much crap these days, but I see a new generation of gate-keepers like Conly discarding the politically-correct niceties for more pointed and unbiased reviews. I wish him all the best.

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